Royalcow Talks About Cats

Posted by Royalcow




I am excited to be here on Immediate Regret (although I did want to call it HopOns, but as long as I can still call our readers that I suppose it all works out). This is really my first time out in the ole Blogosphere, but you may recognize my terrible drawing from Wheezy's blog here and here. From time to time I will be posting more terrible drawing and I should be covering movies and video games, since I do watch and play a lot of both. However, today I think I will talk about my cats.

My fiance and I have two cats, Atari and Bruce (shown above). Atari is lazy and very cat-like and Bruce... well he thinks he is a dog. Just like ask Ross. I had Atari awhile before I got Bruce and in that time she got a little chunky. By that I mean that she often looks remarkably like a toad when she sits down on her front paws. Go ahead, imagine a toad with a cat's head. That was Atari. So they are both now on a diet, which seems to give them an excuse to eat anything they can find. Here is a list of things my cats have eaten lately:

• Shortbread (on multiple occasions)
  
• Loaf of wheat-nut bread
• Toilet paper
  
• Protein bars (kept on top of the counter where we can barely reach them)
• Headphone cords
  
• Granola (which was retrieved from inside a closed backpack)
  
• Cardboard boxes
  
• Sunflower seeds and almonds
• Pull tabs for the zippers on my backpack (which was then thrown up all around the apartment)
  
• Umbrella
• Lard

This might have been somewhat more acceptable except the mess it made. On more than a few occasions we would wake up to little food bombs all over the kitchen and living room. Anything left on the counter overnight seemed to be fair game and a zip-top plastic baggie was nowhere near good enough of a barrier. Needless to say something needed to be done since the little missus was threatening felicide for the next cat that ate anything other than cat food or bugs.

In comes Ssscat. Basically, its just compressed air (or refrigerant) attached to a motion sensor. Combine with cats with hilarious results.

I saw Bruce take a blast of cold air right in the butt the first time we had it set out and nearly fell off the couch laughing. Thanks to Ssscat the cats seem to be cured of their counter exploits.