Immediate Regret: Christmas Party Advice

Posted by Double M




Well, its about time that everyone will be having their company's annual Christmas (or Holiday if they try to be PC - obviously not a concern here at IR) party. Here at IR, I have some tips for you so that you will not immediately regret your actions during or after the party.

1) Make sure you dress appropriately.
Look, I love a Christmas Sweater as much as the next guy, but make sure you're not the only one wearing a bad sweater. Otherwise, you may become an outcast. Just ask Texas Tech QB Graham Harrell. He didn't heed my advice and now he's been issued the unvitation to the Heisman ceremony this weekend.

H/T: EDSBS via Sporting News

2) Don't talk about someone you don't know.
I am fortunate that I work in a small office where I know everyone, but Christmas parties often bring together people that you don't know, like spouses, out-of-work friends, or crazy people from other departments. If you've never met your coworker's girlfriend/wife/daughter/sister/brother/boyfriend/etc. don't just walk up to them and start talking about the hot/fugly chick/dude across the room. Only bad things can happen. Example:

3) If you choose to drink, do so responsibly.
Its Friday - if you're going to the bars feel free to indulge in an inordinate amount of alcohol. I know you've had a long week of working, shopping, etc., so you deserve it. That said, play it cool at the corporate Christmas party. Not only could you get sloppy and doing something stupid. Here's an example from a Christmas party starring some people you may recognize.

4) If you're a hombre (that's dude en Espanol), don't wear a thong.
I like to keep things short and 3 rules would normally be enough, but in light of recent events, I thought I should put this out there.

You would think I shouldn't have to say that. What are we coming to?

So there you go, that's 4 rules that you should follow in preparation for your company's Christmas party. Follow them and you should avoid the immediate regret/embarrassment/year-long jokes/firing. Break even one and you could be in some trouble. Good luck and have some fun.

Have a good weekend.